Yet, oddly, your so called long and rambling post ended after a mere two paragraphs, and although it really didn't amount to much, it does substantiate my claim that you will run out of words after a short time, thus giving me time to rebuff your limited response and continual ramblings about much of nothing and nothing of much - similar to being put on hold when you call the electric company to pay a bill, and out of sheer boredom, you press "2" to speak to someone in Spanish, and then when someone comes on and says "Hola, como esta?" you answer in a very deep and raspy voice ,"Bist du sprechen Deutche, meinen freund?", which will make the poor Latino on the other end of the phone roll their eyes and say something trite like "No habla Englis?" but of course you respond with "Arbeit macht frei!" and start humming World War II tunes off key, which will amuse the foreign customer service agent for a minute, and then she'll put you on hold, looking for someone who speaks German and as you wait and listen to the elevator version of Stairway to Heaven just as they get to the good part the song is interrupted and someone says "Kann Ich hilfen sie?" and your say "Hey, this is AMERRCAAA, speak English you prick" which then gets them mad and just before they hang up you say "Hey, I wanna make a payment - don't you want my money?" so now they have to find someone that speaks English and you get put on hold to the tuba version of AC/DC's Hell's Bells which would sound a lot better if you had a buzz on and was sitting in you favorite chair at home watching the tractor pulls on ESPN-2 but again as the good part rolls around the song is stopped and someone with a very heavy Pakistani accent says "Hello, my name is being Tim and I am here to be helping you to pay your bills so please to speak to me in English and I can help you now" but you just grunt, letting them know the line is not dead, but they're not worth even a syllabic response and then they say "I am here talking to you! Do you want to talk to me or not to talk to me in English?" and then in your best Southern drawl you say "You're not from around here, are you my friend?" and then Tim says "Oh, no, my family comes from PasaSumhumbrahaha MakaHumusaMubra which is actually a small cardboard box just outside of Bombay and It is a nice box and it pleases me to say that it is much better than the one we lived in when I worked for AOL support" and you answer "Unh huh...but does it have a bathroom?" and Tim says "Surely you are making a joke of me - No one in PasaSumhumbrahaha MakaHumusaMubra has a bathroom - We just pass around a small ornamental bowl and fill it as we go - But enough about talking about me - We are talking about you and the bill you are wanting to pay" but then you interrupt him and say "I was going to pay my bill but I wanted to speak to an AMERRRCANN not some towel-head living out out a box and connecting to the Internet using a tin can and a dial up line you guys are all cavemen why don't you get the hell out of the middle ages and join the rest of us in the 21st century and for God's sake get those damn cows out of the street they smell and block traffic and crap everywhere and whoever told you that the cow was a holy creature was actually pranking you but you guys are so gullible you believed it and now the cows live better than you but if you really want to live stop by McDonalds and we'll show you what a cow really tastes like especially with tomatoes and lettuce and special sauce with a side of fries" and as you stop to take a breath Tim jumps in and says "This has nothing to do with you to pay your bill and I do not think that you should be speaking about these things as you know not anything about our culture or how it is that we are to be praying to our God and to be keeping sacred to our Cattle .." and before he can finish his rant you start to laugh maniacally and say "Oh, nevermind - the cops are here and I have to reload my shotgun right now so we'll just finish this later okthxbai!" and you hang up and go back to the fridge and open it to find that you only have two six packs of beer left which won't get you past dinner so you call up your friend Bubba to see if he can pick you up a few cases on the way home from the bar but he's already plastered at 8PM on a Tuesday night so your call goes to voicemail and then you leave him a nasty message about his skanky wife and then hang up but now you have to go get your own damn beer 'cause your old lady ain't come back from her second job yet so you find the keys to the pickup truck near the front door and as you stumble outside you trip over the loose board on the porch that the wife had been bitchin' about for weeks and you kept ignoring her and now you wish you had fixed it cause you're lying on your back in the dirt at the bottom of the stairs looking up at a bunch of flies circling your head and your back hurts but you can't feel your legs and then your trusty hound-dog Luke wanders over and as you go to pet him he sniffs you, lifts his leg, and pees on your shirt and then you go to swing at him but he jumps out of the way and you smack your hand against the rail post and you can hear the bones crack as your pinky breaks and now you're gonna have a helluva time opening those beer cans but you're tough so you manage to roll over, get on your knees and stagger back to your feet and dust yourself off as you shamble to your 23 year old Ford pickup that is more rust than paint and the door creaks as you open it and the cab smells like old farts and ancient oil but that don't bug you since the windows are stuck down and you'll get plenty of fresh air once you get this son of bitch started and after three or four tries the engine coughs to life and the truck shakes and spews out black smoke like a coal-burning train but you don't care you turn on that AM radio, roll past the two Gospel channels and settle in on KRAP the shit-kickin country music station that plays songs that end up so much better if you played them backwards and as you drive away to the minimart you can't help but thinking that if you had ten minutes with Shania Twain you could show her how a real man makes sweet love to a ho like her but then if your wife ever found out she'd wait till you passed out and she would cut off your johnson with a dull teaspoon and feed it to the pigs which would make it real hard to pee or ever really go out with the boys again so you forget about Shania and just keep your eyes on the road and as you pull up to the minimart at 8:01PM you see that they have just closed for the night and you aint getting any beer unless you drive into Barstow which is another 43 miles away and you don't have enough gas and as you're debating this you see some lights overhead getting bigger and bigger and as you look up you see that it's a spaceship and your truck suddenly stalls and before you can get out a bright green beam of light surrounds you and you and the truck are lifted into the ship which speeds away at warp seven and you black out only to wake up face down on a cold metal table as these big headed green aliens are taking turns stuffing engine parts from your truck up your ass and laughing hysterically as they do it while watching old reruns of "Gilligan's Island" and fortunately for you the pain is too much and you finally pass out again..."
Now, THATS a rambling sentence!
![:-D :lol:](./images/smilies/icon_lol.gif)